I HATE ODD NUMBERS......

Considering that two days ago I turned 59 I would be remiss if I didn't at least share some thoughts on getting older. You know odd numbered events are not generally "over-celebrated" by adults. Ever heard of a surprise, I don't know, 59th birthday or maybe a big gala for a couple's 31st wedding anniversary!  Already some of you know-it-alls (and you know who you are) are asking about Christmas on the 25th and Halloween on the 31st.  I am not talking about national events, I am talking about personal events.  The first big 'odd' number birthday we tend to celebrate with flourish is when we turn 13! We are no longer children and I can look back now and at 13, I thought I knew it all!  Seriously?

Over the last few years so many things have happened in my life that have proven to me, without a doubt, there really is a circle of life; it's where you are on the arc that is significant.  Obviously, I am at the top of the slippery slope.  But look what it took to get here! From the bottom of the arc I have climbed, made my way to the top and I am now just heading in a new direction, back to where I began!  On the journey I like to think I have used what I learned from my struggles wisely, that I have taken what I have learned from other's struggles as a precautionary measure to proceed carefully.  Every time I start thinking about this whole thing I can almost hear that song from "The Lion King" in my head!!  To make it short and sweet we (folks my age) are passing the torch on to those who follow behind us!

I watch my children with their children and I remember the absolute joys they are experiencing along with the struggles they are facing.  Even though they are not aware they are slowly climbing and each step and misstep leaves a mark, a footprint for those who will follow them.  It is a daunting task and one can only hope the footprints are clear enough to see and deep enough to step into.

So, what is my reward for the climb? They are too many to name and I can only hope what I leave behind for them will be something they can treasure.  It is true what they say about the true measure of a person because when you are gone it is reality you leave behind not impressions.  A perfect example is my Mamma.  She taught 5yr old children in Sunday School for over 50 years!  One wish she had at the end was to have some of these 'children' be pall bearers at her service!  With each phone call I got a resounding "Absolutely, I would be honored"!  So my Mamma made her final journey on earth being carried by six men, all different ages, that knew the true measure of the woman she was.  She taught them for one year and her influence on them lasted a lifetime.  This is the most we can strive for, not how much money we leave, not just the memories but the things we etch into the lives of those around us.

To that end, I think I have a couple more arcs to conquer before I can follow in my Mamma's footsteps but each day something I do, or say, or think is part of what she gave to me.  That should be the ultimate goal for each of us. While we are living, live well and when we leave, leave well!

Would I like to go back to my 20's, 30's even 40's?  Hmmm - NOPE!  I would like to feel like I did then but there is comfort in being where I am.  When you are younger sometimes it's hard to figure out where you are going, how you need to be, the path you need to take -- when you are my age -- it's a nice slow-paced walk to those things and I really like that part of this age, ODD number or not.  As I sit here right now my greatest hope and wish for my 60th (even #) birthday in 2012 (even #) is that I am here and I can celebrate!!